Diary of a Stiletto Junkie

I woke up this morning and could barely move my head.  The prednisone makes me super swollen and as I lose the weight my muscles hurt from being used oddly when I was so heavy. 
Anyway, it hurts.  Hurts like a son of a bitch.  Went to get a massage this morning, helped but not for long.  Went to Dr.  he gave me pain killers, barely touching it.

Seriously, why does everything happen to me?

FML

OUCH

Why are you surprised by my bluntness?  You made it clear where we stood, I made it clear what I wanted, when & how.  Don’t be shocked.

The worst thing to see when you are all fat is hot skinny pics of yourself.

I can’t help that I am fat right now, which sucks.  These stupid steroids have me all jacked up and while I am only about 20 lbs too heavy with fluid right now (instead of 30 + last week) it still sucks.  I also have about 10 lbs in fat to lose once all the fluid is gone and I can move about properly.

So the other day I am emailed a bunch of my old modeling pics that had gotten lost in the shuffle… Sadness.  I miss my body:(  I want it back NOW

Patience is a virtue I was never blessed with

You have to realize that your friends are adults.  You can advise them, guide them, do your best to help them.  When it comes down to it, however, they are grown ass adults and will do whatever they want and you can’t change that.

Accept them for these flaws or don’t, but know that we all have them.

Let’s call him SC… On occasion, from time to time, for, wow, like 2 years maybe… He infects my thoughts.  Nothing ever happens, we’re just friends and I am almost happy for that, i adore him so endlessly.  Still, on occasion I wonder… and when I let my mind go there, I spend a week with wild fantasies and mild flirtations until I return to the reality that my dear friend, as oddly alluring, fantastic the fantasies, good on paper as he is… Is just that.  No harm, no foul… But wow, these fantasies, lol…

Good night

Game knows game, I just don’t play.  See, when you ask me a question you get the damn truth.

God, your so typical it makes my head hurt.